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How To Show Up For Yourself.

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What does it mean to show up for yourself? 

Beyond physically showing up where you have an appointment, a plan or obligation. Show up for yourself – walk your talk, and talk your walk with integrity and honor. Strive to not for greatness, but to do your best each day, to also honor the days you need to rest, reflect, or just be still or at one with yourself. 

Show up – be true to you. Treat yourself with loving kindness. Treat yourself as you would your child, your grandparents or even your fur-baby. 

Every day you make decisions and choices to show up for yourself, or not. 

How can I honor my body and still eat junk food daily. How can I value peace yet, stay in an environment that is toxic to my being, or start an argument, or lash out, even just online with a stranger, or even if just in my mind to myself.

Ask yourself what is most important to me? Showing up for yourself is making sure your daily actions, (words and thoughts) are in line with what is most important to you. Make a list of your priorities and ask yourself before starting something new, is this in line with my priorities?

Doing some shadow work is helpful in being able to truly show up for yourself. The “Shadow Self” is a concept first coined by Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung, that describes those aspects of the personality that we choose to reject and repress. 

Carl Gustav Jung 1875-1961

One experiment you can do to reveal your shadow self, and begin to do shadow work is one by a college professor. He handed out cards to his students and asked them to think of the person that irritates them the most. Maybe even the person they “hate” the most… once they have that person in mind, to write down 5 things, or reasons this person irritates them. 

Then he told them to look at the list and identify at least 3 of those things that are within themselves, parts of themselves they hide, or repress. 

This can be pretty eye opening, and can help start some shadow work. 

Showing up for yourself isn’t always easy. Especially if you’re the type of person that avoids confrontation, people pleases above your own wishes or needs, or has some unhealthy habits (physically or mentally)

Who doesn’t have unhealthy habits, don’t worry, you’re not alone. Showing up for yourself  is being honest with yourself, and a willingness to be candid and vulnerable. A willingness to work on those parts of yourself you may try to repress, as well as working towards improvement. There is always more to heal, more to learn, more ways to serve yourself (and others) If you’re on this earth as a human – there’s room for improvement. 

“Nobody’s perfect, but all of us can be better than we are.” -Jackie Stewart

Again, this doesn’t mean you have to run yourself into exhaustion, or burnout striving for improvement. This would in fact, be the opposite of showing up for yourself. 

Rest when need be, do what you love, do what feeds your soul, be who you say you are, and most of all, show yourself love and grace. Sometimes showing up for yourself is just choosing a small step in self-care.

If you’re having trouble even identifying what is important to you. If you have been disconnected from self for so long, you don’t even know who you are anymore. I would love to invite you on a quick contact call. A free consultation to show you how I may help guide you back to self.  To learn more, check out my HypnoBreakthrough website.

So I ask you, are you showing up for yourself? I would love to hear how you show up for yourself. Regardless of if you’re interested in booking with me. I love hearing people’s stories and the different paths we have all found to self love and self improvement. 

Please take care, inside and out. -Pamela Topjian

Use This Technique To Live Your Future Life Now!

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Have you heard of future life progression?

There are techniques in Hypnotherapy known as regression therapy. The Hypnotherapist will guide you into a state much like a dream state. Relaxing the physical body, quieting the conscious mind, and directing the subconscious mind to take you back to a place or time. This is often in childhood to help release blocks, forgive yourself or others, or to have a silent conversation within your mind’s eye with your past self, or another from that time in your life. I have found this to be very beneficial for myself, and my clients. 

Another regression technique is Past Life Regression (PLR). Two of the most prominent names of this therapeutic approach are psychiatrist Dr. Brian Weiss and Doloras Cannon, founder and creator of Quantum Healing Hypnosis Technique (QHHT). In this technique the hypnotherapist gently guides you back in your mind’s eye to a past life. Which can be beneficial in many ways. 

Both Dr. Brain Weiss and Dolores Cannon have several books, if you would like to learn more. 

However, have you heard of Future Life Progression? 

A few quotes and sayings relating to this; If you can see it you can be it, if you can dream it you can do it. As above so below, as within so without.

“The way we experience the world around us, is a direct reflection of the world within us” – Gabrielle Bernstein

Inner Changes absolutely create outer changes. You don’t have to have the answers to how it will happen, or even know what you would like your future to be. 

With hypnotherapy we go deep within your subconscious to gently release blocks and obstacles that may be holding you back. This will open doors, and allow you to be aware of opportunities and paths you may not have noticed before. We ask your subconscious mind, your inner wisdom, to guide you towards the best path for you.  

Future Life Progression

Some steps you can take on your own right now, is to look at a photo of yourself as a child, or even a younger adult, and ask them to tell you where they see themselves in 5-10 years. Ask what their biggest dreams are. Close your eyes, or keep looking at the photo and imagine how they may have answered such a question. You may want to do this in meditation or by journaling.  So often we will get answers by just writing out a question, or a statement and then free hand, or free flow the writing (sort of an automatic writing exercise) You may be surprised at the results.

Are you interested in experiencing the Future Life Progression Hypnotherapy technique for yourself?

Then do something today, that your future self will thank you for and contact Pamela to get started on HypnoBreakthrough’s Future Life Progression program: 

This is a commitment to yourself and your future self. 

The Future Life Progression program consists of 3-6 sessions all together (depending on your needs and responsiveness)

In each session we will relax your physical body, quiet your conscious mind, and then clear your energy field, inside and out. In subsequent sessions, which will vary according to your needs and responses we will:

– Take you to a childhood dream of yourself as an adult.

– Look deep within yourself for clarity and guidance.

– Remove limiting beliefs from your past, which may have caused blocks, and obstacles deep within.

 –Take a look back, and a look ahead. 

Future Life Progression

Contact me to schedule your FREE consultation if your excited to get get started on this program! Send an email at Pamela@HypnoBreakthrough.com or use the contact form on the homepage HypnoBreakthrough.com

I Wrote My Memoir

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It is such an amazing feeling to have reached a goal of publishing my story, and to be an author. 

My book is titled “I Didn’t Come This Far to Only Come THIS Far” Another title I considered was “The first fifty years are only practice” 

This is my own memoir. I started writing this book 5 years ago, and it was published in January 2022. I like to say that  it was 55 years in the making, and 5 years in the writing. Which is absolutely the case. I had a hard time coming to an end, since I was going to stop writing and end this book when my life settled down. However,  it’s clear that isn’t happening any time soon. I didn’t come this far to only come THIS far! I keep going, keep reaching my goals and dreams. It’s all even amazing to me, considering where I came from and how far down I was. 

I wanted to share my story with others, to show that in a real life story, that no matter what you are going through, or have been through, you can do more than survive, and just exist. There’s nothing special, or different about me. Much of what I have been through is all too common. 

I started writing my life story mainly as a form of therapy. To get it all out of me, and off of my chest. It was difficult at times, but very therapeutic. My story is one of childhood trauma that led to trauma in adulthood, eventually leading to a total breakdown in life. It doesn’t stop there, in fact that breakdown was a catalyst to a breakthrough in life. Now I’m not only living my life, but loving my life, checking off goals and thriving, finally in my 50’s.

My ultimate hope is to inspire others, so they know they are not alone, and that it can and does get better. I also wrote my story so as not to go to the grave without my story told, from my own point of view. So my ancestors will have a peek into the life of their great great grandmother or aunt. My goal for the book is to have made an impact and to know that it gave hope to those who have felt hopeless.

“I Didn’t Come This Far To Only Come THIS Far” by Pamela M. Topjian

I plan to write a book about the experience itself. The experience of writing out my story. As well as a bit of a how-to. There have been many people who have told me they have always wanted to write their story, but don’t know where to start. I may continue with volume two, as to what happens next in my life. This will depend on how much interest there is and how the rest of my life plays out. 

I do feel the need to give a sensitivity warning for domestic violence, rape, poverty and neglegt. This book is not all negative or depressing, it does end on a high note, reaching my goals and loving life! I just know that there is so much more to come. Because, it’s true “I Didn’t Come This Far To Only Come THIS Far” as the title says. I’m very excited for the future! 

A bit about me personally; I’m very happily married in a loving respectful marriage after two toxic marriages. I am the mother of two adult children, I meditate daily, and a certified hypnotherapist conducting sessions worldwide through zoom and phone. You can find more information on my website: HypnoBreakthrough.com I help people to dive deep within their own inner guidance to make positive changes in their lives. I changed careers after 14 years in the medical field as a licensed nurse to assist people on a more holistic and deeper level. I love animals and help with pet sitting here and there. I also love to paint, my artwork can be seen on products on Redbubble.com under “PamelaMarieArt” I sell the original paintings myself. My Book can be found on Amazon in paperback, kindle and on kindle unlimited. “I Didn’t Come This Far to Only Come THIS Far”

Thank you so much for your interest. If you do read the book I would love honest feedback, weather or not you write a review on Amazon.

Meditation.

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Are you one of those people that feel like you can’t meditate or have tried meditation to no avail?

So many of us have heard how important it is to meditate, or how life changing it could be. Just as many of us have had a hard time, even with guided meditations to quiet our minds at all. 

I have been meditating for years. The times I needed it most were the times it was the most difficult. In the beginning I had to work myself up from guided meditations to focused meditations to quiet still meditations. 

I am now able to just sit quietly and still my mind. However I still will do a focused meditation or a guided meditation. They all have their place and differences. 

If you’re one of those people who always has some mental chatter going on, your mind always has some internal dialog, you may not be able to just decide to be quiet and have that “work” Then you feel that you just can’t meditate. I hear it almost daily, “I can’t meditate” or “I tried and it doesn’t work for me” 

Let’s discuss what meditation is, and different types. 

According to merriam-webster dictionary 

Meditate:

  1. To engage in contemplation or reflection.
  2. To engage in mental exercise (such as concentration on one’s breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness. 

Nowhere does this definition mention quietness or stillness. I’m sure some definitions in other places do mention a quiet or still mind. 

We tend to think of a guru in the lotus position, maybe even up on a mountain top, in robes with a long beard, or bald head. 

Meditation, in my mind, is more about inward reflection, or attention. There are no hard and fast, black or white rules to meditation. You do not have to sit in a certain position, you don’t even have to be still. Many people get caught up in doing it “right”. 

One of my own paintings of a hiking trail.

Walking meditations or even some forms of music/sound therapy, and art therapy have a lot to do with meditation. When I paint I absolutely lose myself in the process. I’m not a great artist but I do get a lot out of the process of putting paint on canvas. You can be so focused on something, that you go into a meditative state, and you forget the time, or what’s going on around you while in that focused activity. That is absolutely a form of meditation. Walking a labyrinth is a known type of walking prayer, or meditation, but walking anywhere can be as well. Focus on a candle flame, an image or a word is also a form of meditation. Focusing on your breath is another very well known and valid form of focused meditation. Guided meditations are where you are listening to a recording, or a facilitator talk you into a state of relaxation (much like the beginning of a hypnotherapy session. I’ll get into how hypnotherapy and guided meditations differ in the next article) 

So, in a guided meditation, you are following directions and able to relax by focusing on the instructions to soften and smooth your muscles, drop your shoulders, take a deep breath ….. etc. Once you know how that feels and are easily able to go into that relaxed state, you are better able to give yourself the directions, and once you get there, to let go. Even for just a bit, to hold onto that feeling. Then you may be able to do a focused meditation on your own. Light a candle and just focus on the flame, or hold a picture in your mind or a word. Such as a butterfly, an animal or a flower or the word love or peace. Pay attention to your breath or your heartbeat.

Do not beat yourself up, or get frustrated when another thought enters your mind, this is perfectly normal. Notice the thought, rather than resist, or push it away. Just allow the thought in, and let it go. If it helps, you can imagine the thought on clouds, and watch them come in, and float or fade away, or on a leaf floating down a stream, and being carried away. 

It’s the expectations and frustrations that keep us from continuing with meditation practice. 

I hope this article has helped you some. Like most other things that are worthwhile, it takes patience and diligence to get to where you’re comfortable and it just comes natural for you. 

If you have any questions, or are interested in hypnotherapy to help you experience that quiet still mind or deep relaxation, maybe for the first time ever, contact me for a free consultation. 

Please take care inside and out,    Pamela Topjian

Hypnotherapy and Pregnancy

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How can hypnotherapy benefit you before pregnancy, during pregnancy and postpartum?

When we hear the term Hypnotherapy in relation to pregnancy, we may think of a type of hypnotherapy called ‘HypnoBirthing’. Many Doulas specialize in this, and are worth looking into for a holistic approach. 

I am focusing here more on the time before pregnancy, during pregnancy and postpartum, rather than just during the birthing process. Although, even without using a specific hypnobirthing specialist, the relaxation techniques, healthy pregnancy and stress reduction will absolutely help reduce pain and fears during labor and birth as well. 

Hypnotherapy is highly effective for reducing stress and depression. Also, to help implement healthy lifestyle habits, such as eating better, better quality sleep, quitting smoking, or other addictions. Hypnotherapy works with the subconscious mind to release blocks and limiting beliefs that may keep you from living a healthy lifestyle. 

Long before my nursing career, and Hypnotherapy training, I had apprenticed with home birth midwives. The mind-body connection is so strong. I have seen examples of this while working with midwives and pregnant mothers. Stress and worry in any mammal can cause physical health issues that are not conducive to healthy mother and baby. Including everything from loss of sleep, stress eating, smoking, drinking even infertility, (discounting any medical issues) to delayed labor, and lactation issues as well. 

It truly is amazing how much our mind can affect our bodies. Imagine being able to release blocks that may be buried deep within your subconscious and the impact that this would have on  trying to conceive. Oftentimes, individuals work with a medical team when trying to conceive, and it is not uncommon for the team to mark the cause as ‘unknown’. The challenge may not be medical after all. Many women are left with feelings of inadequacy, or that their body has failed them. This may also then cause them to to have trouble breastfeeding or conceiving another child. It’s a whole domino effect that starts with stress. Sometimes something as simple as hearing our mothers talk in our childhood about how hard labor was, and we have internalized this, without even realizing this block or limiting belief is buried deep within our subconscious. 

If you’re trying to conceive , even though the medical team cannot find a medical reason, before you try invasive and costly treatments, give hypnotherapy a try. We can release blocks that may be buried deep within your subconscious, even if you don’t know they’re there and implement healthier lifestyle habits as well.

If you worry about everything during pregnancy, from what you eat, the air you breathe, or even the responsibility of parenting,  rather than enjoying this time, Hypnotherapy can help to ease your fears, and develop confidence, inner strength and inner peace by relaxing the physical body, quieting the conscious mind, and adraddress the subconscious mind to release, the blocks and heal. It’s hard to understand the feeling, and how it works before you experience it for yourself. This is why I always offer a sample session within the free consultation. 

If you have an unhealthy habit you’re having a hard time letting go of, whether you’re trying to conceive or currently pregnant; Hypnotherapy can help you to develop healthier eating habits, quit smoking or drinking or other addictions. Even learning to fully relax, let go and manage pain. So many ways Hypnotherapy is beneficial for couples, and moms trying to conceive, in pregnancy and the new parents. 

For more information please contact me for a free consultation. Although I reside in northern California I work with clients all over  the U.S. Let’s have a chat, get any questions or concerns addressed, and you can even have a sample session to see how it feels for you before you make any commitments. 

I have a couple of friends I would like to mention that are doing great work in this area as well. (Please mention my name, when you reach out to these amazing women)

Laurel Segal. Owner and founder of The Seagull Nest, is a Postpartum doula, Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant, Child Passenger Safety Technician and Lactation Educator and has an extensive history with infertility and challenges around trying to conceive. Unfortunately she didn’t know about hypnotherapy during her personal journey through infertility, She understands the challenges that go hand-in-hand with infertility and trying to conceive. She is passionate about helping others on this journey and throughout the process from conception to parenting. You can reach her at Laurel@Theseagullnest.com 

Sometimes the unthinkable does happen, the loss of a child is reality for many. This past loss can also prevent you from becoming pregnant, or be a  cause for repeated miscarriages if not healed. 

Monica Pleinis. Owner, founder of Compassionate healing hypnotherapy, facilitates a program to help with the pain and grief of pregnancy and child loss. Monica has personal experience in the loss of a newborn, and has healed as much as one can through hypnotherapy as well as other healing modalities. She is passionate about helping others to heal from this personal heartache as well. She can be reached at m.martinez2@hotmail.com 

Thank you so much for reading and please feel free to reach out with any questions or to schedule your free consultation! You may send me a direct email at Pamela@HypnoBreakthrough.com or send a msg though the contact form at the bottom of the home page.

Please take care, inside and out.

Pamela Topjian

My Portrait Session

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I had a portrait session with MartinJon

The session:

It’s a conversation that feels at times, like friends talking, and at times like a counseling session. He will ask you to speak on aspects of your life, and is acutely aware of the words spoken, your expressions, and which ones hold energy. All while he is creating your portrait. One helps to facilitate the other. The portrait comes from the discussion more than trying to get the details of your physical image. This is why the portrait has so much feeling. 

This is a true gift he has tapped into within himself, that he shares as a healing modality like no other. 

We discussed such things in my life such as, fears, parents, siblings, childhood, my own children, pets, career, physical issues, friendships… and more. I (we) connected some dots that I hadn’t realized even through EMDR therapy, or my own meditations.

So much to reflect on and meditate on.

My portrait session with Martin Jon

 

The portrait:

The portrait itself looks sad and a little angry. I hesitated to actually post it here. It’s not a glamor shot, or meant to be flattering, it’s meant to be real. To facilitate healing. It’s like a ‘dark night of the soul’ awaking. The other side of the mirror.

My first reaction when I saw it (in zoom/video call) I said to him “no smile” It wasn’t a question, but a statement. Just an observation. I honestly had zero expectation, and was looking forward to the process more so than the actual portrait. MartinJon brought up that my first reaction was interesting, because I am a peacemaker and healer and I don’t want to make waves… (mostly) So..  I don’t cry and I don’t get very angry often, this isn’t a conscious effort, it just is a fact. So that’s pretty telling right there. 

The smile can be like a mask, or peace making. He saw through my nervous laughter, which I wasn’t aware of. It’s second nature at this point. I wasn’t trying to hide, as I mentioned, I absolutely was looking forward to the process, knowing it was going to be deep.

“Peace begins with a smile” – Mother Teresa

My inner self:

Maybe that’s who I really am inside. My inner self, my inner child surely is sad and angry. 

Before this, I wouldn’t have said, or thought I was angry as a child, or angry about my childhood. I am though, come to think about it, I feel betrayed. He used the word “Betrayal” and noted that I hadn’t said it at all throughout the session. I can’t remember a time I ever have used that word. It’s true though, starting at a very young age, throughout most of my life.

So connecting those dots (much more than I mention here) helps to overcome the deeply rooted stuff, the inner child stuff. It is a process, it’s a journey, a place to dig deep, feel, grow, and evolve. The portrait sitting is a catalyst and opportunity to get to the root, if you want, and are ready. He doesn’t force anything, or tell you what to do with this, all of this. This being the art, or the realizations. The work is within you. Much like Hypnotherapy. MartinJon’s work would be great to do before hypnotherapy! (or maybe after)

After the session I wrote some notes. Did some meditation, and worked with the Ho’oponopono prayer. 

In conclusion:

I highly recommend you try a portrait session with MartinJon, or the other services he has to offer. Link at the top of this article. (When you contact him, let him know you heard of him from me) This is deeper than you could imagine. I also cannot yet “conclude” anything because this work will continue. He is mailing the actual portrait to me, and we will see what comes up. There is an offer for anyone having a portrait session to go on to have more coaching sessions with him.

Thank you so much MartinJon for all you do for so many, this is life changing.

Conclusion of Contest

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At the end of June I ran a contest for my birthday, and one winner was chosen by random number generator online. The winner had 6 sessions 2x a week and here is the conclusion:

The focus was on a phobia the client had since childhood and it was negatively affecting their life, not daily but at least monthly. We did some techniques to release blocks and obstacles and some childhood regression and childhood connection sessions. 

We had a couple times that our sessions had to be rescheduled,and a recording was given in its place. Some homework was given as well. 

My client did notice some emotional responses, and some successes. They were able to have a chance to test out the phobia, and were able to carry it through. This is not a cure all, but a good start. 

This is the client’s response: 

“I told Pam I wanted to work on my claustrophobia during my sessions. We did them at night, which I really liked because they are so relaxing and aid in a good night’s sleep. 

The following day after a session,  I would wake up with energy – something I don’t normally do. As time went on, I would notice that I did not fear tackling things I would normally shy away from. I had a real sense of confidence and calm. 

I also was able to pinpoint exactly what my fear is…..being in a situation, relationship or job I do not feel I can escape easily. Is it a control issue?… I’m not sure. But I do feel more confident and maybe that’s the first step to healing.” – Suzanne P. (7/21 contest winner)

In conclusion; I agree, confidence is very helpful in healing. The client also told me they did not listen to the recorded sessions. I do think this would have helped with the focus for the sessions. This shows while it’s great to listen to guided meditations or recordings, actual contact with a person is much more helpful. If  nothing else, at least for accountability. We are much more likely to do something that we have planned with another.  I am so happy for the success, and realizations. I do feel this was something deeply rooted and with more sessions we would have more success for the phobia itself. Overall, I’m pleased with the outcome and was glad to be a facilitator towards finding more confidence within themselves.

So what do you all think? I Love offering Hypnotherapy to those that may not be otherwise able to have it, or may not reach out, but with a contest are more likely to try it. This was my first contest of it’s kind. One thing I think when I do another, that I may not just have it open to anything the winner would like to work on, but to have a more general, overall confidence, self love or stress reducing/relaxing sessions. This way the client/winner isn’t left hanging, so to speak if the amount of sessions wasn’t enough for the issue.

What Are Soul Contracts?

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What Are Soul Contracts and how to complete the contract.

Many people believe in past lives, (rebirth, reincarnation etc.) and with that, they also believe we are much more than our physical selves. I believe this. There is a technique of hypnotherapy to show you a past life: Past life regression. Dr. Brian Weiss and Dolores Cannon are two of many that have made this known more mainstream. 

However, soul contracts are more about the time before your life, or in between lives. Some believe, as I do, that we have a soul family, much like a soulmate; however people that are placed in your life on purpose to teach you something you need to know. Not necessarily ‘lessons’ , but to give you an experience for your better understanding of life. 

If you have ever been through something difficult that hurt you deeply, this situation was part of your soul contract. If you don’t want to repeat this, then step back to gain clarity on the reason. To gain understanding. Hypnotherapy can help with that. Writing it all out, journaling, and meditation can also help, or any combination. There are many ways to gain clarity on a situation. If you’re having triggers this is showing you where you need to step back and take a good look objectively. 

Our soul family, or soulmate are those we feel deeply connected to, usually as soon as we make contact, you feel drawn to this person, or some odd ‘coincidences’ or ‘twist of fate’ brings you together.  

Often these people are with you over many lifetimes. Some of these people are like thorns in your side, and you can’t seem to stop reliving or being triggered by their hurtful actions. These people can come in your life for just a month, or they can even be family! 

There is also a hypnotherapy technique to sever energetic cords or end contracts. Send these souls on their way thanking them for their lessons and sending them on their way with love and gratitude. This can also be done in meditation on your own. 

I have a guided meditation: Release soul contracts. This guided meditation is a good way to show you where to start if you’re new to meditation. If you watch, please feel free to leave a comment, and let me know how you felt afterwards, even come back after a few days to see if you notice anything. If you don’t want to be public with your experience I always welcome private messages on my social media, or via the contact form on my Breakthrough Hypnotherapy home page

As always I love hearing from you! If you have any suggestions for future articles or topics you’re interested in reading about here, (or more guided meditations on my YouTube Channel) please let me know.

Thank you so much for being here! Remember, consultations for hypnotherapy are always free of charge, and include a sample session so you can see how it feels before you make any commitments. 

Take care, inside and out! 

Pamela Topjian 

Motivation and Focus

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How can I become more motivated to reach my goals, more focused to stick to a routine or my to-do list? I hear this a lot! 

We all know what we “should” do each day. We all have a long to-do list, but why can’t we get it done, or why do we procrastinate? Is it our motivation, our focus, or our lack of discipline?

 Are you inspired, or motivated? Inspiration is internal, feeling called to do it,  motivation is external. When you’re inspired, motivation comes naturally, no resistance, no forcing. We get mad at ourselves, and that inner negative self-talk kicks in to reinforce the feeling of not being good enough, being lazy or worthless. 

A different perspective. Maybe you aren’t supposed to do all the things on your list alone or within an unrealistic expectation for one person? It may be an opportunity to learn to speak up for yourself, set boundaries, and stand in your power. Look where you can prioritize and delegate. Maybe you need more experiences in your life before that big dream or project can be completed. 

For instance; an inspirational person may come into your life, or you find a new book or podcast that makes a difference in your life somehow. You may even have an experience. Often it’s the unexpected, life changing experiences that show us our true calling, where our heart truly is. This may open more doors, or give you much more information and helpful tools to get that project done, or help you to achieve that dream. 

Personal example; when I started in Hypnotherapy in 2010 I never was able to get a business going full time. I had felt like a dream was lost for many years, feeling disappointed in myself. Then so many things happened in my life that have helped to shape me into a much better Hypnotherapist. Including an opportunity (along with a full on deja vu experience) for more education and certification. 

Just something to consider, this may be why you’re not working on that project or making that dream come true as fast as you would like. There may be more going on in your favor than you realize 

Deadlines, schedules, routines. Some people work better without deadlines, schedules, or routines. There is nothing wrong with that. Throughout our lives,  from almost day one, we’re told that it’s time for this, and time for that…. We don’t all work best that way.  We have different times of day that we’re more productive than others. Some do much better on night shift jobs than day shift jobs. 

Why not do 3 days worth of that 10 day course when you feel excited to do it, rather than fall behind because you just don’t feel like doing it every day. Don’t kick yourself or give up, because you’re not doing it according to some timeline. (unless required to of course)

Society pushes us to believe routine and schedules keep us on track and moving forward. For many that is the case, and you may want to use fancy or fun color coded appointment books, or organizer apps. Add on your list, some fun things, or self care routines. 

For just as many others, it’s limiting for us. If you feel like or are more motivated creating or working or whatever it is, at 3 am, do it. Know yourself and what keeps you feeling good about the work or creative endeavours that you hope to achieve. Is the schedule helping, or keeping you feeling bad about yourself for not sticking to it? 

Of course we have things we absolutely have to do to live, and sometimes we have trouble staying motivated or focused. You may need to prioritize. The vacuuming can be done another day, the laundry may need to come first, the bills must be paid, etc. What can you do to make these tasks less daunting? Think out of the box, or out of your comfort zone even for some of it. Put things on auto pay, order your groceries to be delivered, ask for help without feeling guilty, and apologizing. 

What do you have no problem completing, or what on the to-do list do you love to do? Sometimes with tasks that need to be done, it’s helpful to tie it to something enjoyable, have some candy guilt free, or play some upbeat music during the task. How many of you love to clean while dancing around the house with the music blaring? 

Step back. Where you have trouble with motivation or focus, is where you need to step back and rethink. What are you resisting and why? Is there something from your past that keeps you in resistance to this? Take a good look within. Step back and ask yourself, why are you resisting these things? When did you think they were so important, did someone else tell you that, or put the responsibility on you? Were you called lazy or never felt validated for the work you completed? Were you criticized for your projects and interests in the past? 

Hypnotherapy is one way to help with releasing those blocks and obstacles that are holding you back. Limiting beliefs stuck deep down in your subconscious from long ago. 

What ways tips have you found helpful in staying focused, or motivated when procrastination takes over, or the job/project seems overwhelming? Feel free to leave a comment.

Please always feel free to reach out with any questions, or concerns. I love to hear from you all – what other ideas do you have for a future article? Are you interested in finding out if Hypnotherapy might help you? Contact me for a complimentary consultation. You can reach me at Pamela@HypnoBreakthrough.com or use the contact form on the homepage.

Please take care, Inside and out! Pamela Topjian

Aging Gracefully

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Aging with grace. 

Let’s talk about aging gracefully. Men and women alike try to turn back time or wish they were 20 again (or even 40) We have fond memories of a social life before children, and the fun we had with our children as they were growing up. For some we miss our elders and wish we could go back to when they were still around.The days of a more active life and activities with friends. Days when we didn’t have aches and pains, our skin was smoother and felt more confident in our clothing.

There is a quote “I know as a woman I’m supposed to be afraid of getting older but, I love this shit so much. Every year I sink deeper into this bath of unapologetic realness and it’s amazing” – Bunmi Laditan 

Realness, I think, equals authenticity, its knowing who you are at a deeper level. Many older people are lost and unsure of who they are. Some will be living life longing for younger days, when they knew they were so-in-so’s parent, or the job title or had roles to play. Many feel lost without relating themselves to another more youthful time in their lives. 

We are spiritual beings, we are not this body that ages with time. Its hard for many to realize or conceptualize this question of ‘who am I?’ without these labels, titles or roles we once had. 

In my fifties. For me personally, my 50’s have been my best years yet. (Just weeks away from my 55th birthday at the time of this writing) Even though I have glaucoma, my eyesight has been bad since childhood, but it’s just going to continue getting worse, debilitating arthritis, which is also going to just get worse. I put on weight much easier and it’s much harder to take off. My  skin is wrinkling and sagging, my face is looking more “granny” like. With the lack of elasticity, nerve damage is showing up on my face from a physical assault, in an abusive relationship years ago. This is all part of who this body is, but for me, I am much more than this. I can feel that spirit within. 

However, let’s talk about aging for a minute from a different perspective than the damage time does on the body.  

Yes, I love aging and maturing. I love my grey streaks in my hair, I don’t mind seeing my mother in the mirror. I love being able to talk to men without them mistaking my kindness, or even interaction, as flirting. I love the wisdom life has given me. I have healthy boundaries in all areas of my life, and know myself better than ever before. There is a sense of freedom to be fully me I have never felt in my younger years. 

In the US, society has brainwashed us into thinking youth is something better than aging. Anti-aging products, the surgeries, the sayings about never asking a lady her age, and the like. It goes much deeper, that is just the surface. 

Step into yourself, let the memories of youth be fun to reflect on, but don’t wish your maturity away. Just like we tell young adults, or children to enjoy this time, and not to wish it away, it’s the same for us older adults. Please don’t waste away your senior years wishing you were young again. You lived it, your life is like no other – write a book or a blog, tell your story, get it out of you for the generations ahead. Enjoy this time, step fully into it, and embrace the wisdom, and freedom. Use the time, don’t waste it. Knowing we are over the hill so to speak, can be a motivator rather than a time of just waiting until we get to the bottom or regretting the loss of youth.

Take care of yourself. Yes take good care of your health, inside and out. Do the best you can to preserve your health, but not so you can turn back the clock, but to live healthy while you’re here. Start something new that you always wanted to try, or learn. As mentioned before, share your story. There is tremendous sense of healing, or a liberating feeling in getting it all down in book or blog form, or even just a recording. If you’re unsure where to start, just start telling your memories – the good ones, and the hard life lessons. You have so much value and wisdom to share whether you realize this or not. 

Self love, and self care is so important during this time. Starting a practice of self care and self love is very helpful if you’re having a hard time with aging gracefully. Hypnotherapy can help with that. However there are many other ways as well. Reach out, please don’t suffer in silence or think there is no hope now. No matter your age, the time will pass anyway, no matter what you do, or don’t do. Why not at least try to feel better about it? 

Any questions, concerns or anything to add to this I would love to hear it! Please, as always, feel free to reach out. Email me directly at Pamela@HypnoBreakthrough.com or use the contact form on the homepage. 

Thank you so much for being here, much peace and love to you.  Pamela Topjian