Are you one of those people that feel like you can’t meditate or have tried meditation to no avail?

So many of us have heard how important it is to meditate, or how life changing it could be. Just as many of us have had a hard time, even with guided meditations to quiet our minds at all. 

I have been meditating for years. The times I needed it most were the times it was the most difficult. In the beginning I had to work myself up from guided meditations to focused meditations to quiet still meditations. 

I am now able to just sit quietly and still my mind. However I still will do a focused meditation or a guided meditation. They all have their place and differences. 

If you’re one of those people who always has some mental chatter going on, your mind always has some internal dialog, you may not be able to just decide to be quiet and have that “work” Then you feel that you just can’t meditate. I hear it almost daily, “I can’t meditate” or “I tried and it doesn’t work for me” 

Let’s discuss what meditation is, and different types. 

According to merriam-webster dictionary 

Meditate:

1. To engage in contemplation or reflection.
2. To engage in mental exercise (such as concentration on one’s breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness. 

Nowhere does this definition mention quietness or stillness. I’m sure some definitions in other places do mention a quiet or still mind. 

We tend to think of a guru in the lotus position, maybe even up on a mountain top, in robes with a long beard, or bald head. 

Meditation, in my mind, is more about inward reflection, or attention. There are no hard and fast, black or white rules to meditation. You do not have to sit in a certain position, you don’t even have to be still. Many people get caught up in doing it “right”. 

Walking meditations or even some forms of music/sound therapy, and art therapy have a lot to do with meditation. When I paint I absolutely lose myself in the process. I’m not a great artist but I do get a lot out of the process of putting paint on canvas. You can be so focused on something, that you go into a meditative state, and you forget the time, or what’s going on around you while in that focused activity. That is absolutely a form of meditation. Walking a labyrinth is a known type of walking prayer, or meditation, but walking anywhere can be as well. Focus on a candle flame, an image or a word is also a form of meditation. Focusing on your breath is another very well known and valid form of focused meditation. Guided meditations are where you are listening to a recording, or a facilitator talk you into a state of relaxation (much like the beginning of a hypnotherapy session. I’ll get into how hypnotherapy and guided meditations differ in the next article) 

So, in a guided meditation, you are following directions and able to relax by focusing on the instructions to soften and smooth your muscles, drop your shoulders, take a deep breath ….. etc. Once you know how that feels and are easily able to go into that relaxed state, you are better able to give yourself the directions, and once you get there, to let go. Even for just a bit, to hold onto that feeling. Then you may be able to do a focused meditation on your own. Light a candle and just focus on the flame, or hold a picture in your mind or a word. Such as a butterfly, an animal or a flower or the word love or peace. Pay attention to your breath or your heartbeat.

Do not beat yourself up, or get frustrated when another thought enters your mind, this is perfectly normal. Notice the thought, rather than resist, or push it away. Just allow the thought in, and let it go. If it helps, you can imagine the thought on clouds, and watch them come in, and float or fade away, or on a leaf floating down a stream, and being carried away. 

It’s the expectations and frustrations that keep us from continuing with meditation practice. 

I hope this article has helped you some. Like most other things that are worthwhile, it takes patience and diligence to get to where you’re comfortable and it just comes natural for you. 

If you have any questions, or are interested in hypnotherapy to help you experience that quiet still mind or deep relaxation, maybe for the first time ever, contact me for a free consultation. 

Please take care inside and out,    Pamela Topjian